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SexSwap 1.23.98
News Tips Trix
Back In Black - Hit The Sack
- Been To Long, I'm Glad To Be Back
This is the almost weekly SexSwap
News-Tips-Trix and it goes to all members of SexSwap Banner Exchange.
It contains information on SexSwap, Porn, Tips'n'Trix, and software
reviews for the adult webmaster. I perform all literary stunts
without the use of nets, safety-cables, spell checkers, or grammar
fixers, and this tends to leave the reader in a state of bewilderment...you
will get used to it.
If this letter looks like one
LONG SENTENCE...select WORD WRAP or WRAP TEXT in the menu of your
email reader.
REMOVAL INSTRUCTIONS
/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_//_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/_/
To be REMOVED, email andy@sexswap.com with your email and sexswap
account #, and ask to be removed.
<=-------------THE WEEKLY
SWAP STATS---------------=>
MEMBERS: 2,250
BANNERS PER SECOND: 30
BANNERS PER DAY: 2.5 million
**************************************************************************
VERY IMPORTANT - VERY IMPORTANT - VERY IMPORTANT - VERY IMPORTANT
VERY GOOD NEWS - WE ARE TEMPORARILY
FIXED - FULL FIX IN 2-4 DAYS
As of today, Wednesday Jan 20.98,
we have a strong temp fix on the server.
This is a temp fix...please listen up....
We have split the code onto 2 servers...they are now sharing the
load.
The problem is that if you try and upload a banner, or try and
view your stats, you will only upload your banner onto one server
and you would only see half your stats. So...please refrain from
uploading banners of from updating any account info...it will
get lost when we do the full fix in 2-4 days.
Note, even though you will only see half your stats...you are
still getting all your credits...they are just being randomly
added between two servers...so 1/2 goto one and 1/2 goto the other...it
is like joining two sexswaps...you get the same showings and credits,
they are just split. In 2-4 days, we hope to have the code that
will tie the stats between multiple servers into the normal stats
routine. We were getting hit botted for a while, and then we were
failing under load. We were not sure if we were getting a denial
of service attack or a syn attack or just server failures...it
is very difficult to isolate this type of activity. We were getting
attacked a from Jan 4 thru 2 days ago...this person has stopped
and agreed not to do it again...wise choice. I would say that
there is a 50% chance that we are still being attacked....BUT
THE GOOD NEWS IS...we are so fucking fast that they have become
a mesquito on my big white ass...and we have squashed them. A
crook would now need to have tons of horse power to even dent
the titanic SexSwap. If he did...we would just add more server
to the array and he would be shit outta luck.
So again, avoid banner uploads and account alterations until you
get the word from me.
**************************************************************************
<=------I DON'T KNOW WHERE
TO START-----------=>
This is just a freaking massive issue of SexSwap news...I have
a list of about 20 items to try and fit in. So sit back, get out
your vodka and OJ because there is much to do about porn below.
Software, Vegas, Crooks, Big Tricks...did I forget to say NEW
BIG TRICKS FOR HITS...and stuff.
<=------CROOK UPDATE-----------=>
NOTE...the foloowing crook update is actually 4 days old and now
things have improved drastically...I left it in for your viewing
enjoyment....
Saturday...I woke up today and
I had a migraine that felt like I had taken a bullet to the skull...it
is all because of this hack bastard that has attacked our server.
I had to run to the bathroom for codeine and immetrix...I'm a
mess. Here is what has happened since....let me look for what
the shit-head wrote me...here is what the crook wrote me after
the most excellent sexswap members dog-piled him
<<What is this about?,
I have stoped using sexswap months ago!, I don't even have a website
anymore!!!!!. Can you please tell me why i get this haressment
letters? And if i still have a account at sexswap, PLEASE REMOVE
THIS ACCOUNT!>>
Oh ya...I want to apologize
to the many good swedish members of swap...a couple of them said
that they were a little scared reading the last letter until they
got to his email...sorry to have rilled you up. And I want to
thank the people that helped out with letters of support and email.
You were all great
Today/wed Jan 20....our servers
our fine, we are fast as ever...we are finishing the code. The
clouds have lifted.
It was a week of hacking, password seaching, ftp log reading...hair
pulling BUT WAIT....guess what...here is some disturbing news....a
couple of our members actually wrote to the hacker asking to JOIN
HIM and asking to be a PARTNER IN CRIME...you know how I know?
Because he forwarded me the freaking letters...can you believe
that...a couple members actually live in the gutter...sad reflection...I
will of course be keeping a close eye on you two members and I
hope you two will quit today...please go bad mouth me to all your
gutter buddies so they stay away from here too!
Also, when we found the hackers
ftp logs, I found out he was hacking two more banners exchanges...again
you can imagine how sad I was that I had to email me enemies...I
hate the competition, but I hate crooks worse and I hope they
would inform us if they found out stuff. They were pretty nice
about getting the tips...but I still love to hate'em. But everything
is fine now and the hacker and I have an agreement and we both
hope not to see the other ever.
<=------IRC UPDATE-----------=>
This IRC trick has sured excited a few folks...and you all keep
asking me for the add-on script. Michael has made a HUGE faq about
all this and more at 209.41.247.178 where is explains much
about irc in detail with spamming. One of the ad on scripts can
be found at www.7thsphere.com. I guess you can also write
your own simple add on one line script...but I don't know a script
from a potato chip, so please don't ask me how to write it...just
pay some young geeky lad.
<=------MIND IF I TOOT MY
OWN HORN - TOOT TOOT-----------=>
Last week I was crying in my milk because of the server troublas.
Then this hot little angel from heaven sent me an email...you
have been awarded the webmasters "Excellent Resource"
award www.adult-webmaster.com/Awards/excellent.html Yippeee
I said. Check out sexy Ylice's site and it is a great site for
webmasters to hang and trade tricks...she is always hosting webmaster
chats on ICQ...and she'll even talk real dirty...just jokes! check
it out for fun and tips www.adult-webmaster.com.
<=------SOME CHUNKS OF PHLEGM-----------=>
Here are some quick news items from swap members...
check out this rad new search engine/multiple searcher www.designlab.ukans.edu/profusion/
I guess the FON companies want
us to start paying per minute for internet access...they are scared
of iPhone and cable modems...they might charge 1 cent a minute
or more. If you would like to speak your mind on this issue, please
email comments and ideas to isp@fcc.gov ...the feds are waiting
to make a ruling...and they are entertaining comments from the
public.
On Mouse Over - again - OK,
I just wanted to re-iterate that I don;t think you should use
on-mouseover for sponsors...they will kick you off their programs...but
i would use it for sending surfers to more pages on my site, or
sending them to another one of my sites etc.
<=------100 FREE HARDCORE
FEEDS-----------=>
One of the guys that got me into the porn biz is Frank at 3i/itslive.
They lead the market with 6 live channels before anyone else.
They now have several hundred channels at various rates for pay
sites. NOW they offer a started pack of 100 channels FREE. If
you want 100 free hardcore channels, please email 3i@wsos.com
and tell him andy says "hi"
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
Intermission
"QUIT STALLLING YOU PIGGY-LIPS - TELL US THE TRICKS!
Calm down, savor the moment....there are plenty of tricks coming
down the pike.
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
<=------NICE SCRIPT TO STOP
THIEVES-----------=>
the funkmaster had a couple of tricks...one was high hits but
a little too sneaky so I will show you his cool one
www.xtasyweb.com/webmasters/scripts.html
there are some great scripts here...check out "anti-link"
this stop people from linking to your free pics and using your
bandwidth...very nice
<=------BIG TRIX ONE FROM
GERMANY NEW AND KEWL-----------=>
the funkmaster from Germany had a trick so GOOD, SO JUICY, that
I almost wanted to keep it for myself...but hey...if I tell you,
you make more money and I make more money...so I gotta tell you.
AND I have thought of a way to make the trick work even better...a
stage 2 of the same trick.
Here is what the crafty german
funkmaster did...
You find newspapers that allow FREE PERSONALS
"Hi, my name is Swanky
Shelly, I am 38-26-36 DD and I am looking for a a real man that
knows how to satisfy my needs and desires and sexual fantasies...please
come to my website www.swankyshelly.com"
Funkmaster said that he doesnt
get that many hits, but his sign up ratio goes through the roof.
OK...here are 3 ways to make
this work even better...
1. There are about 100 PERSOANALS sites on the web...some are
free, some are free for a week. Go to Yahoo and search and you
will find one. I know a great one but I'd rather not say any because
you characters might hammer the shit outta them...so go and search
and ye will find.
2. Guess what...some of them allow a picture...I say put a regular
pic ...like sexy but no porn...a teasre...and you will do well...if
you are a female webmaster with a site about you...I think you
have it made.
3. Guess what again...people look for dates near them...so place
1-10 ads per state! 10 adsX52 statesX10 persoanl service is like
5000 ads working for you!!!! And these ads have like a 1 month
life!
4. Some place so not allow urls...so sneal around by using "go
to sexyshelly.com" and leave out the http
5. OR say "email me sugar" and then leave an email,
but at that email...put an autoresponder where you hit them with
the full URL and a sexy ad.
I think this is virgin territory...this
could be the new gold mine...go crazy!
<=------BIG TRIX JACKPOT
OF WEB STUFF-----------=>
www.davecentral.com/webauth.html
check this out...this page is so full of 8 million pieces of software
for web creation, promotion, serving etc etc.
Look at the menu down the left side...then click on a catagory
to see all the amazing stuff inside. You will find everything
in here.
<=------BIG TRIX THREE SEARCH
ENGINES AGAIN-----------=>
So maybe you have a submitter but need an edge on the competition.
Have you seen WAHOO! I haven't used it but it looks like a nice
piece of code. I think it runs like a cgi, rather than a stand
alone piece of software. The code writer claims it "kicks
the wizards butt!" www.superscripts.com/wahoo.html
<=------FINE SCRIPTS AND
A PROGRAMMER-----------=>
Check out the excellent collection of scripts also at Drew Stars
www.superscripts.com/
and this guy also does free lance programming. When people ask
me about "Gus", I say "Gus died a few weeks ago"
Why? Because it is fucking hard to find great programmers, and
when you do, everyone wants to steal them! So check out this young
lad "Drew" and maybe he can create that little widget
that you were looking for.
<=-----EMAIL SOFTWARE-----------=>
I just wanted to recommend a couple of nice email programs for
windows.
I personally never liked Eudora...don't know why...maybe becasue
it has a spell checker and I need to consistantly spell badly
or you might not know it is me. But I have found two slick emailers.
I have about 5-8 email addresses and I need a program that can
check all 7 and be easy to use. I use Calypso! Never heard of
it eh? Well it has now received about 6 awards from twocows, xdnet,
rocketdownload etc etc...check out a demo at www.mcsdallas.com/mcs/calypso/index.htm
Calypso Emailer 2.4 ...I dig it.
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
Intermission 2
Wow...I told you this was a big one...this is like writing "War
& Piece"
`````````````````````````````````````````````````````````````
<=-----VEGAS BABY-----------=>
So last week was the big IA2000 porn show in vegas...it was pretty
fun..and there were many babes with basketball boobs and greasy
jeaslous boyfriends stuck to them. The booths were elaborate and
the fanciest that I have ever seen at any tradeshow. There were
some cool parties. There was a great party at Sega Gameworks.
I had about 17 JimBeams and was being a usual "foosball
vampire" waiting to wail on any unsuspecting challeneger...had
some great games with a filthy mcnasty character and then it was
off to the driving games where everyone was pedal to the metal.
Did you know that on those driving games that they make it so
you can't get away from your buddy. A programmer there told me
they call it the catch-up algorithym....seems a little sneaky
if you ask me.
OK, but the most excitement
in vegas was "The Gerber Ultra Flushmaster Toilets"
No, I'm not on heroine or crack. I took a plop and flushed....and
the water swished it away like Niagara falls! It was like the
space shuttle flew over...I thought...this must be one of those
old toilets that had 87 gallons of water. After a day of more
exciting flushing...I just couldn't take it...I had to crack open
the back and see what was in this vantastic toilet. So I cracked
ope the lid and inside was a draft ball...but it wasn't a draft
ball...it just looked like one...like a metallic silver drum...NO
WATER! So I read on the drum...flushmaster. I ran to the web and
started searching...guess what...it turned out that I was using
some new fangled pressure toilet that Consumer Reports rated #1
Toilet in the land
www.terrylove.com/crtoilet.htm
www.terrylove.com/toilet1.htm
I had to have one! So I called
Gerber and found a distributor in my area. I've always hated saving
water and I always hated 2-flushing...I recommend the Gerer Ultra
Flush to anyone who feels the same way! And the Monte Carlo hotel
in vegas had tons of these great little units.
<=-----THAT'S ALL FOR NOW-----------=>
One last non-porn, non-toilet item, if you dig playing Quake2,
check out the new server that dayne "the IP" has set
up for members of completeweb, sexswp, and freeadulthostiung quake.completeweb.net
Come and frag Dayne, Gus, Gary and me!
Are you freaking exhausted yet?
How many spelling mistakes did I make?
I gotta have some Jim and Dr
P and play Q2...and all you sexy webmistresses, drop me an email...
I'll email everyone again when step 2 of the fix is complete.
Thanks for all the support and help over the last two weeks when
things looked bleak.
Later Skaters
Andy
read more juicy sexswap news
at www.sexswap.com/trix.htm
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